My 20 favorite quotes

Just to get things going again after some absent here is some quotes that each have helped or help me in one way or another. When young some of them hang on my wall, now they are the background photo's on my pc. I hope you find them ok to.

Wonder what End Trigeminal Neuralgia is? EndTN is an awareness page for trigeminal neuralgia, a facial pain affliction, You can have a look at the page. 

A confession of a gallbladder

I've been bad, I know it but I just could not help myself. A perfect victim to my little plot. 

It started years ago. In the beginning I gave subtle and gentle hints. Uneasiness when eating fries, blown up stomach when too much goodies, bad night's sleep when eating too late. Just once in awhile as a reminder.

On our gallbladder FB group I get comments from other gallbladders that usually the host is totally oblivious to what our little bladder can do. Strange explanations are common and even people that should know better, blame our dysfunction on loads of other stuff.

But my host seems to be one of the more stupid ones. So I've been playing with her for some time.

Usually when we throw in heavy blown up stomach, pain in ribs, pain in back, nausea etc the host does understand that something is off and a doctor becomes our best friend helping in how to treat us better.

It started with me being kind and over the last years giving her very clear signals that I'm not to happy. But has she taken them? NO! Even with a family history - nope no bells have been ringing.

So I've become more and more naughty. I've thrown in some fever spells where she's been laying in bed shaking with cold. So cold socks, extra pysjamas and blanket have been put on, still to clattering teeth. But still no lights on. Cold flashes and menopause she said.

I've then slowly made her stomach blow up, at the end so big that it looked like she was 9 months pregnant with twins. Did it help? No, again menopause she said. Body changes then.

Rib pain, back pain and cramps then. Now I should get some attention. You believe what she's said? It's just the regular off days due to the fibro. Really, really, really!!!

Ok so now it's a challenge, how far can I go before she uses that brain of her's. 

As it turned out very far.
Added nausea, a lot of wind and bad stomach. Still nobody's home. Fibro, allergy, menopause. Excuses - again stupid excuses.

A week before Christmas I started a full on attack. Everything at ones, day and night.

Any movement in the brain department? No! How is that possible?

So I decided to really disturb her night sleep that is not good in the first place. Any takers? Nope.

In the end I had to throw it all in at the same time, adding pain so bad that she had no sleep at all and did not want to eat anymore.

And then the coin dropped.

It just took me around 6 months of heavy campaigning before she (under pressure from husband) finally gave in and went to see a doctor.

I felt rather proud of myself when the guy doing the ultrasound burst out saying: OOh la la la, this is not good at all. And asked my host why she had not gone to a doctor about this before.

Result of my campaign: Enlarged gallbladder with heavy infection and at least one stone blocking the tubes. Infection in intestines too. Yes! I did it, total blockage!

Afterwords: 

Of course I did not think too far ahead. Now the fun is over and my days with my host will soon be over too. She is not letting me play anymore eating a no fat, no fiber, no dairy, no gluten and no spices diet. She's sticking to the "baby" food.

I still tell her I'm here, making it uncomfortable for her to sit. But that pleasure is short lived. In 2 weeks time I'll be gone.

Oh well, it was fun while it lasted!


Photos/illustrations from Pixabay.com
https://pixabay.com/en/users/Passagere-1215412/
https://pixabay.com/en/users/kaboompics-1013994/
https://pixabay.com/en/users/nataliaaggiato-470329/

My love affair with music - 10 music moments that define me or my life

Music is like listening to waves. It calm my soul and mind. It opens up new doors and it lets me enter a world of magic. Music can make you forget and transport you far away. Music can make you aware and take a stance. Music can be a dream. Music can make you aware of reality. Music is life and life is music...

1. Griegs "Morning" from the play Peer Gynt

I just have to start with my former blog post: The paper plane. It was such an incredible moment when it happened and it has stayed with me for the 20-25 years since. When I started teaching the class I was told I would get nothing, that the class was not cultural and not very responsive. That 8 year old boy with his beautiful narration proved them so wrong. It made a beautiful memory for me but more than that it's been a constant reminder never to listen to the "no sayers", the "it's not possible sayers" , the "they are not interested sayers", the "generalisation sayers". It made me continue what I believed in, never give up caring, trying and that small actions can change the world. Enjoy!

2. Tchaikovsky - Sleeping Beauty Waltz

My parents had a lot of vinyl but this became special very early on. At the tender age between 1 and 2 I decided this was mine.  I danced around the living room totally in my own world. It was played again and again and again. At age 4 I did start taking ballet lessons and though I stopped at 10, ballet has always been very close to my heart. 

It introduced me to a magical world. The music is made for movement, elegant, gliding, dramatic. Close your eyes and let the music carry you away. Let your mind be filled with images and motion.

I will let this piece of fairytale music stand for my love for classical music. It started with Tchaikovsky and continued with Chopin to a large number of others. Some old, some modern.

3. Jussi Bjørling "O heliga natt"

As my mother introduced me to ballet and Chopin, my father introduced me to opera, jazz, rock. The greatest of them all was the swedish tenor Jussi Bjørling. Growing up I loved listening to this powerhouse of a singer where the emotions rushes out of the speakers and hits your body, soul and heart. Dramatic, melancholy, beautiful and unreal when hitting the high notes. Nothing can fill you body in quite the same way as opera can. I've been fortunate to see many operas in many different places. I can not wait to see more!

The clip is in swedish but his power, his voice and his charisma comes through. Probably the first opera record I heard as this has been played every christmas since I was born (and probaløy before that too) No christmas without it. It's no secret I too love opera, italian opera.  As the first clip is in swedish I'll leave you with a 2 clips, the not so unfamous "Nessun dorma" from Turandot by Puccini:

4. Piotr Tchaikovsky: The Nutcracker - Ballet in two acts

Being fortunate enough to live in a city with a ballet and a mother who also loves it my introduction to ballet at the opera came young (4-5 years). I was absolutely mesmerized. The grace, the beauty, the movements, the music. A story told without words. Images I had floating in my mind when listening came to life on stage. Such an explosion of mind, soul, thoughts and dream.  It's been many ballets since, but this was the first to open the door to a new world. 

5. ABBA: Waterloo

And then came ABBA, 1974, Eurovision. I was 6 1/2, Waterloo, the first cassette I got for my 7th birthday with a cassette player. Instant love. I would drive my brother crazy with playing the songs over and over again, performing in front of the mirror with a brush. Again I would close my eyes and let myself be transported away. And those costumes. Perfect, just perfect. Since then its been many albums and many favorites but this one started the ball. A love affair lasting 40 years (so far). 

6. David Bowie: Life on Mars?

I don't remember what was my first Bowie song, but I'm rather sure I heard it on Radio Luxenbourg one night when I should have been sleeping. It could have been either of them Rebel, Rebel, Changes, Life on Mars, Heros or Starman I don't remember. There was something in his voice that spoke directly to me. Today I would say he has a sensual, strong, very recognizable voice that both surprises and captivates - I was definitely captivated by this strange but cool music. He still surprises and stretches the borders, creating new music.  Listening to him I always felt it's ok to be different, it's ok to be myself...

7. Edith Piaf - La vie en rose

At 14 I started with French in school. As a little girl I played with a french girl on the boat to Kiel (or was it Copenhagen). I right away fell in love with the language. So beautiful. I did not excel as a student or learn much then. But I did learn one thing. French songs. Oh how beautiful, its a language made for singing. so much passion, so much beauty, so much emotions. Again when the voice filled the room I was in awe. What a voice this little sparrow had. Edit Piaf became very prominent as around the same time there was a play about her life. What life, what sorrow but also what courage and lust for living. 

8. Hanne Boel - My kindred spirit

I've been to many concerts and seen many big and small stars. Amazing concerts like Bowie in Hamburg, Simple Minds in Drammen or Tina Turner in Oslo.  Still one concert stands out. In 87 or 88 in a small rock club in Aalborg, Denmark, a former backup singer was on her first tour. She had been told her voice was to dark to make it solo. She proved them wrong. Rock Nielsen was filled to the breaking point and everyone wanted more. Again, don't stop believing in yourself.

She has this dark, r&b sound, rough and delightful at the same time. I'm still a fan of this cool Danish lady many albums later.

9. Apartheid in South Africa - 2 songs in one post

The Specials - Nelson Mandela

I am not sure when I heard about Nelson Mandela and apartheid but it must have been in the 70s. From then followed his fight for freedom. This song reminds me and so many others of the long way he had to go. Many wrote letters and protested hoping for a change. I did not dare to hope for a change in my lifetime but it came. Never give up on HOPE!

Peter Gabriel - Biko

The story of Steven Biko is a strong one that we never should forget. A man practising non violence trying to change a horrid system, killed by his efforts. The core message so important still today.  If you haven't seen the movie Cry Freedom from 1987 its worth while. Strong story, strong performances and a reminder we should never forget. Its not us and them its WE.

10. Live Aid 1985 

Using music to raise awareness had been done before, but not on this scale. Watching MTV and seeing this outpour of solidarity, money and awareness was something I will never forget. Yes they said it's useless, its just a show, it does not matter. But it did make a difference in many people's lives. It became legitimate to care. The crises in parts of Africa came straight into our living rooms. From that moment on you could chose to care or not, but you could not use the excuse you did not know.

So many artists that day that stuck in my mind but I suppose the one performance that stood out was this: Queen.

As a teenager seeing this massive response of caring was enormous. I suppose I've always felt we should help each other on this planet and suddenly there is was. It made me stronger in my belief that one person can (and should) make a difference.

-----

I'm the MTV generation, music videos and Levis commercial. Music was not just on the radio or on vinyl, it was everywhere and using music as a tool to bring awareness got a new medium. Of course I'm a product of that time. There are so many others I could have mentioned, artists I listen to, who have followed me for years or new acquaintances.

Music is the past, the present and the future.  Music is forever.

Bette Midler the Rose

This song and its lyrics have followed me for almost 30 years now, in good and in bad times. 

It seems a fitting end to a post about music and me...

The paper plane

Many years ago I was so fortunate to be working as a teacher for some time, filling in for teachers that was sick. For 4 months I was the teacher of a class of 8 year olds.

As part of arts and craft I one day asked the children to put their heads down on their desks, close their eyes and just listen to the music letting their minds go free creating images.

28 children did as asked and the only sound in the classroom was Griegs "Morning" from Peer Gynt.

Slowly we returned to this world and I asked if anyone wanted to share what had played in their minds.

One of the boys put his hand up and this was his story:

"It was sunny and I was running on a huge open green field with the trees standing beautifully in the background. 

Above me a paper plane was flying. The sky very blue. 

The plane was slowly moving with the wind, gliding beautifully over the open green field. 

I was running to it, trying to reach it but it sailed just above my head.

I followed the plane as it slowly descended. The world was quiet. It was just me and the paper plane on the big field. 

Slowly slowly it circled. It was so beautiful.

Finally it glided just over the green grass before it gently landed in front of me. 

It was a perfect day." 

I was speechless and rather moved. So were the other children. Everyone was looking at him in awe finding his story a beautiful one. A lot of wow and I can see that. 28 children united by the beautiful narration of their classmate.

I have cherished this story in my heart for the 20 something years now.

I'm sharing it with you this week, after the Paris attacks (and the others) where I see so many comments about how dangerous muslims are, how barbaric they all are. All the harsh and ignorant comments flourishing.

This was a normal class except for one thing, all the 28 children came from immigrant families. This remarkable 8 year old boy telling this beautiful story was a muslim. The class listening to him was too. Don't judge what you don't know. Xenophobia is not a beautiful thing. This boy's mind was.

A beautiful soul in a beautiful mind!

We must enjoy the day - waiting for the rain

August is here, it might get cold soon... No not really...

We have to take advantage of the sunny warm weather and be outside. Coming from Norway enjoying a warm day and not spend it inside is rooted in me. When warmer than 15 degrees c and sunny you storm out and spend the whole day outside. You simply can not let such a beautiful day go by, who knows when you'll see another one. 

The problem is of course now I live in the south of France. For the past 7 months this has been the weather:  Sun, sunny, warm, sun, warm, sun, sunny, 2 drops of rain, sun, sunny, very warm, sun, sunny, warm... ok and some wind. You get the picture. The weather is rather nice down here.

Beautiful day in April

But my head still tells me you have to get out, if only to lay in the hammock in the garden. It's way to nice to be inside. The small project inside can wait for a rainy day.

It's the beginning of October and I've had on summer jeans 10 times or so in the last 7 months. The one item I've worn the most: A Sarong.

Don't get me wrong, I absolutely love it. These months are what makes all the difference. But my brain has not switched to Languedoc weather yet. I still get guilty if I stay inside and its lovely outside. It's just that is lovely a lot of the time here. More or less all the time from April to October. So these small projects they stay projects for now at least.

Never know how long the sun will last... October 1st

Several times it has been predicted rain, and it might rain in the next village but not with us. One day we had orange alert, that means very strong warning for flooding. And it was rather horrible other places but here it rained for 30 minutes. 2 days of heavy rain turned out to be drizzle for 4 hours.

So small projects wait for a rainy day - that so far has not come. Tomorrow they say it will rain and the temperature will drop to 10-15 degrees.

So we did take advantage of this lovely autumn weekend with temperatures up to 30 degrees Celsius. It's been spent outside. Waiting for the rain. that hopefully will come. And then we might start one the small projects.

We have to enjoy the day - October 10Th.

Unless it gets warm again. Then we have to go out and enjoy it. You never know how long it will last my brain tells me. Luxury problem I know. 

Update: It's now november 20th and we are still waiting. We've had 1 day of rain, proper rain. Then some windy days and some a little colder. Today it's still 21 degrees (c). It's rather amazing.

Mayronnes sculpture trail - a little wonder where the road ends

Nadine Trescartes: Le cri. Permanent exhibit. 

Aude is full of history, nature and nice surprises. Everywhere you turn something catches your eye. In a small valley in the Haut Corbieres, the Corbieres mountains, art and magnificent nature are blended together. At the end of the road lays a hamlet that is host to a spectacular art walk. Here are some of the sculptures.

Mosaic from the trail.

Mayronnes is the starting point of a walk up into the mountains. A special walk. A walk amongst sculptures. A beautiful tribute to art, life and nature. A walk I've wanted to take for some time but not been able to. But this year we did. Armed with hiking boots, walking sticks and taped up ankles the 5 kilometre trail was to be explored.

Charly: Tortues. Permanent exhibit.

What a path and what an experience. The sun was shining, it was hardly a breeze. Green, lush and beautiful the track goes up and up.

Raymond Galle :  L'arbre couché. Permanent exhibit. 

It's not made to walk fast, along the way different pieces of art are integrated in the scenery.

Jean  Lebeau: Couroucoucou. Permanent exhibit. 

Cleverly done.

Robert Cros:  Agrafes. Exhibit 2015.

Some of the artwork are here permanently.

Robert Cros: Un, deux, etc. Permanent exhibit. 

 Others are this years contributions.

Nadine Trescartes: Le cri. Permanent exhibit. 

Finally you reach the plateau and what a view.

Nadine Trescartes: Métronome 2. Exhibit 2015. For full sculpture see further down.

These are just some of the artworks. I will be back with more photos at a later date.

Raymond Galle : Les 3 pierres dressées des Corbières. Permanent exhibit. 

Walking back the track takes you into more forest areas and again beautiful views and interesting artwork.

Anne Sarda: Mes tissages. Exhibit 2015. 

Anne Sarda: Mes tissages. Exhibit 2015. 

An almost perfect walk in nature! *

David Vanorbeek: Élégance. Permanent exhibit. 

I will be back!

Nadine Trescartes: Métronome 2. Exhibit 2015.

* While the path for the most parts is ok to go there is one part towards the end that is absolutely horrifying.  It should come with a little warning for those having bad joints, heart problems or bad eyesight. It is not a walk any more but an "adventure" trail obstacle course. A very steep climb on a tiny rough trail where you have to drag yourself up after trees. I apologize to the artists as I had no appreciation for their interesting contributions.

When you are through the bush walk you reach a new plateau with some really cool artwork, more  on the way down to the parking again. I will have to go back (and up where you go down) another time to be able to appreciate them and take pictures.

There is a shorter version and of course you have the possibility to go for longer walks in this magnificent area.



Here is some more information on the walk in
English http://www.audetourisme.com/diffusio/en/activities/exhibitions/mayronnes/mayronnes-sculpture-path_TFOFMALAR011V504QD2.php

and French: Sentier Sculpturel de Mayronnes
http://www.sentiersculpturel.com/

A visitor has finally come home

Travelling, studying, working in other places or countries was fun. Different. New adventures. Standing at airports, train stations, bus stations talking to people most said the same: " I've loved being here and there but it will be so good to go home, to where I belong." I had no idea what that feeling was, what they were talking about.

It felt strange, different, lonely in a way, not feeling that I had to be somewhere special. That one place. The "tears in the eyes" thinking about going home. I was feeling many things, crying many tears but never over "home" home.

Many talk about feeling alienated when you come home after a short or longer stay abroad. You don't really fit in, belong any more, you've changed. Others have changed. The place you left has changed.

The thing is, if I'm totally honest, that's how I've always felt deep down. Since childhood. That I was kind of a visitor, passing through.  An "alien" if you like.

Standing at any station leaving a place to go back to Norway I often had no desire to go at all. Of course it would be nice to see friends and family. Sleep in my own bed. But longing and looking forward to see the hills around Oslo to feel complete? No I did not feel it.  It was just my base, where I came from.

One of my manager ones told me: "You're problem is not being afraid of change as most, but that you whole life is about nothing but change. You need change to much. I'm afraid that you don't root." He was absolutely right.  I was not "home" home anywhere, rooted, knowing deep down that this is where I belong.

I was a little envious of others knowing with absolutely certainty where they belonged. Me, I was like a water plant surviving in any container filled with some water, passing through. Sometimes for a day, sometimes for a week other times for years. Visiting not really rooting. Being strange but fine at the same time. Not looking for that one place either. I was many lovely places, meeting many nice people. More than 40 years went by. Life was after all good.

Then one warm day in July I knew. No fireworks, no big emotions just driving on an unromantic highway in a part of France I had never been. An inner peace, a certainty. Finally I knew what many had been talking about. There on a stretch on the highway "between the 2 oceans" I knew: This is it.

I'm home. 

Epilogue: We now live 10 - 15 minutes from that part on the highway. I finally understand the "tears in my eyes" when leaving or going back. I have moved out of the water container. I'm rooting. I'm becoming a real tree. I'm at peace. I belong.